"From Being Suicidal to Being a Superwoman”
From being Suicidal to being a Superwoman the journey was not easy. I come from a Hindu orthodox family from the era when women were not encouraged to work or even pursue higher education. Due to this, I was forced to drop my CA.
On the other side of my life during my college days, I fell in love with a boy which again was against my family’s rules & culture. After months of convincing & too much reluctance, my family finally agreed to get me married to the love of my life.
I got married and I thought that I would be happy, but I was not, then I had 2 wonderful daughters and I thought that now my family was complete & I finally will be happy, but I was not.
And then came one of the darkest moments of my life. I had never ever thought that even after creating the family I wanted, I'd still feel so miserable, so unworthy & so unfulfilled that I'd want to end my life. But I did try ending myself.
Sometimes life puts us in situations that we can't even imagine in our worst nightmares. I was focusing on what I was supposed to focus on, as per the society. To give my 100% to everyone, my family, my marriage, my kids & the house else except myself.
I wasn't happy within; I always could hear a voice within that said.
“This is not the life that I want.”
“I want something more.”
“I am born to do something BIG.”
“I don’t want to settle for less.”
“Why have I even taken a birth?”
My mental health kept on deteriorating; I was put on medication. Had many medicines for many years together. The smile on my face had almost gone. I started doubting my own existence itself. Deep down in my heart, I felt very sad, very heavy, as though, that was the end of my life and there was no solution to what I felt or where I was. I kept looking for solutions outside. But nothing changed. I still remember that feeling when I left home with the intention of giving away my life I was blank I took the taxi to a place I shall not specify. In the midway, while the taxi was moving, the voice inside me was shouting that this couldn't be my end. Let's keep what happened for some other day but I came back home.
And then I made one change and everything around me shifted. I started focusing on Myself, My Heatlh, My Happiness, My Growth & My Success. And that is when I realized my Own Potential. The journey so far was not easy I had to come out of my comfort zone, sacrifice a lot of things, and learn difficult and new skills. So, I did whatever it took to be here, Where I stand today.
This wouldn't have been possible if I hadn’t changed my focus towards me. Many times I felt like giving up, had lots of failures, ended up with tears in my eyes & had many sleepless nights, and faced a lot of objections & rejections and also I was mocked. But I just kept going. I believed that only I could give myself the life that "I DESERVE". I didn’t want to settle for less.
So, here I stand today, never to ever look back again and set an example for my daughters and the world that nothing is impossible, “JUST DON’T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF.”